Today was a beautiful day... nothing particular... nothing specific... just nice.. quiet, restful i suppose. Over the course of the meteorlogically indecisve afternoon, had the pleasure to engage in a conversation with an old, far-away friend... a wonderful amica who is experiencing the back-lash affects of a week-long Stephen Dedalus moment [epiphanies as a rule are a brilliant thing [if you are conscious & strong enough to know that you are having one.] it's what you do with the enormous realization that determines which direction the life pedulum swings.] There's a cloud of profound confusion that arises when the safety of schedules suddenly disintegrates in a sunny afternoon... a guilty association with a day spent wrongly, self-indulgently, on "unproductively" . Why are vacations always viewed as periods that demand the lack of activity? The absence of that which occupies us, the big black hole in our otherwise over-simplified universe?
no. 'tis not. there can be no such thing... there is no binary see-saw of work vs. non work, of "productivity vs. unproductivity". there is no such thing as a dichotomous perspective of life demands. It's all part of the process... there's no finish line that we should be staring down the horizon for, there is no piece of paper that guarantees life success, no single job, no "winning" marriage that is the ultimate answer... there is only a process... the process to find some happiness and share it... and yes there is the space between and the space itself...there is the breath that supports between words...there is that time to stop in order to rebegin.... vacation is nothing if not a reevaluation of energies, a shifting of concentration... a moment to expand the ever flowing river without the constrictions of daily life demands...
For this reason, i ascribe to the Confucious belief that those who do what they truly love are never forced to work a day in their lives. If your 'work' does not acknowledge who you are as a constant, ever-growing, ever-becoming person, if what you spend your time and efforts on does not make you genuinely happy, bone-deep satisfied, and inspire you to grow, become, be and do, if it does not truly allow you to become a more genuine, more authentic, more finely attuned soul, then you must reevualte both what you call work and that brief period of non-work.
Because essentially-
in the process-
there is no such thing as work. there is no such thing as vacation.
no. 'tis not. there can be no such thing... there is no binary see-saw of work vs. non work, of "productivity vs. unproductivity". there is no such thing as a dichotomous perspective of life demands. It's all part of the process... there's no finish line that we should be staring down the horizon for, there is no piece of paper that guarantees life success, no single job, no "winning" marriage that is the ultimate answer... there is only a process... the process to find some happiness and share it... and yes there is the space between and the space itself...there is the breath that supports between words...there is that time to stop in order to rebegin.... vacation is nothing if not a reevaluation of energies, a shifting of concentration... a moment to expand the ever flowing river without the constrictions of daily life demands...
For this reason, i ascribe to the Confucious belief that those who do what they truly love are never forced to work a day in their lives. If your 'work' does not acknowledge who you are as a constant, ever-growing, ever-becoming person, if what you spend your time and efforts on does not make you genuinely happy, bone-deep satisfied, and inspire you to grow, become, be and do, if it does not truly allow you to become a more genuine, more authentic, more finely attuned soul, then you must reevualte both what you call work and that brief period of non-work.
Because essentially-
in the process-
there is no such thing as work. there is no such thing as vacation.
posted by HindiK at 7:10 PM
15 Comments:
Great post! I really enjoyed and related to it.
Nice post; I can relate to all that.
With your Confucious belief, which I do share, you presuppose two things:
1) People have the clarity to know what they enjoy.
2) People can afford the luxury of doing what they enjoy and still feed their families.
While you can argue that #1 is a component that any person worth anything would have (I would disagree), #2 is definitely usually not the case.
It is a noble ideal though, mainly useful in making people pine for what could have been....
as per excremental word plays, that must be the most... touche.
;)
Why did you delete the rest of your comment?
g'day, you. i like this difficulty that you pose to yourself (par. 1) and then the suggested resolution (par. 2) that follows. it's interesting that at first you talk in the language of those fixed, dichotomous terms (self-indulgence vs. hard work, activity vs. inaction, + our favorite black vs. white), but your response comes in a more subtle, cyclical grey. self-indulgence, inactivity-- they're all part of the "negative spaces" in a large, beautiful composite. so no more guilt. if we would be talking face2face i think we'd agree that sunday/monday might have been just as productive as a week churning out papers, fueled by the power of java. in a different sense, of course...
aah my dear- you know Henry James lived for a spell in the great Roma, and a whole slew of 'em writers shacked up in Venice [namely that poet in curls]...and Florence [reading Stendhal at The Basilica was incredible]... forget not our dear friends George! Ms. Lavish! Ms. Bartlett! indeed... you must promise to lose your Baedekar upon arrival.
it appears that i am...
*overwhelmingly jealous actually*
in regards to commental editing-
did not want to be overly harsh nor critical on the masses of society. tho' i must confess at this moment it seems that the only way to awake one from an unconscious state is to shout in their big cyber ear as loud as possible.
consciousness breeds the courage to change.
as far as i see it, in order to successfuly emerge from the cyclic reconciliation of habitual behavior one must overcome an enormous fire-breathing Chimera:
1]if we are unaware of both life and self, we cannot truly see what it is we lack; and most importantly we have no clear grasp on who we essentialy are [perhaps we end up living in the reflection of self presupposed by those around us, living like an automaton with artifical sensitivities].
2]even if we are fortunate enough to have such lucid insight we must find the strength and courage to respond to it. We must recongnise its innate truism and be unafraid to let it inspire us-
3] following this wonderous epiphany we must fuel ourselves with that vision, and implicate true change. that realization must serve a profound purpose, it must change us, moves us, and shift the axis upon which our daily habits evolve.
this is what makes us worthy to call ourselves human. truly those that are called "great" are they who define their humanity most astutely. and yes, without this conscious process we are nothing if not single-cell floating amebas.
if one lives with a deep understanding of who they are [and that Self is constantly changing, growing, expanding], they can live without all the answers to life, in fact the deep secrets are almost irrelevant... they simply know what it is that makes them deeply happy and are unafraid to seize it.
it is not a luxury to know yourself. it takes effort- and diligence to pursuit that happiness. sadly, i believe prefer the "road more taken". it just appears safer even if it leads to dismal pools of unassuming quicksand...
hindi-
that was nice, and true.
please dont worry about being "overly harsh on the masses of society"......as if.
in terms of a reaction to my post, i could harp on the fact that there is a subtle difference between the "consciousness" which was the subject of your post, and the "clarity" of mine. (lack of clarity is when you "epiphanize" and "become conscious" at a rate of 5 times a day).
but i shant. rather, as an isolated post, what you said was very true; hat duly tipping- kudos.
however, if two people stared me in the face, one fully "human" as you define, but totally atheistic, and the other a "single-celled floating ameba" who keeps the mitzvos because of his default lifestyle, i'd have to endorse the torah jew.
point being, theres more to life than just being "human".
is there?
dear Sir,
how is that you define your humanity if not by the divinity that presupposes it? If not by that Higher Source that breathes its Life? If not by that which affirms your very existence?
Justifying what is essentially only behavioral Jewish practice is aboslutely preposterous, in fact, it is nothing short of being theologically insulting. It is implausible to be associated with the ChaBaD movement and be an unconscious human. Such practices move beyond the hypocritical, they become one large paradoxical claim; thus rendered completely meaningless. mitzvahs are intentionality, divine relationships, modes of extending The Consciousness into reality, not mere cultural practices. if that is the case there is nothing that differentiates us from others.
[Yes, there is a place for the 'tehilim zuggers' of society but that is it, a specific simplicity and innocence, both of which are inherent to that particular sub-group, and should not be encouraged for the whole.]
and, dear Sir, if you believe that i epiphanize at a rate of five times a day [which i believe must surpass even the likes of Stephen Dedalus] than you are badly mistaken. although we are all in a perpetual act of becoming, clarity must always remain a constant or there is no way to navigate nor create a true life pattern.
dearest mademoiselle (whats up with that 'dear sir'? 'comrade' will do just fine)-
my position regarding pious 'single-celled amebas' versus the atheistic "human" is precisely because of chabad.
im not claiming that either person lives the ideal lifestyle, and hence your claims that such a person is the antithesis of chabad may very well be true.
however. mademoiselle, however.
chabad is all about ma'aseh bepoel. end of story. all the other ideals are nice, and divinity presupposing humanity is a noble thought, but they are only a means to an end.
the end is maaseh bepoel. its the running theme starting with the tanya and ending with the the mantra of the Rebbe.
you villify my justifying "behavioral judaism" as insulting and meaningless. but know, dearest mademoiselle, that when the other choice is judaism in theory, in whatever form, then the preferred choice is behavioral judaism, even if it is done by a "single-celled ameba".
again- your explanation of why behavioral judaism is anathema to idealistic chabad may be true, but idealistic chabad wasnt one of the options. of the two options given, chabad itself would endorse your single-celled behavioral jew.
davka chabad.
about epiphanizing- i wasnt referring to you. and i disagree about your "clarity must remain constant". maybe the clarity which is synonymous with your consciousness, which is essentially your personality. not the clarity which dictates your career path, outlooks, attitudes, etc. as you said, we are all in the act of becoming.
in closing- "is there?"
yes, there is.
sarcasm is unnecesary.
you are right.
here's to multiple, simultaneous conversations, each carefully not infringing on the other...
right, losing Baedeker, symbol of flouting instruction and achieving "free-spiritedness." still, you can either lose it like the horrendous miss lavish or like our dear emersons in S. Croce. lucy herself (your namesake) provides a good model for tourism. in fiesole (ch. 5,6?) she unabashedly proclaims herself as a tourist to reverend eager (it's refreshing that she doesn't try to "blend" among the "local color" like that ridiculous pseudo-feminist and pedant of a clergyman) thereby remaining safe and accounted for (as a tourist she's prudent and aware of her surroundings), yet at the same time lucy absorbs the "internal life" of the city, allows herself to be lost in the undictated beauty of Florence. so. ma'aseh b'poel :). baedeker will be kept for logistics like maps, transportation, and places of refuge, although the impressions of a city will be solely our own.
i was thinking about my "gold star" and "A+" taunts a few hours ago, and i humbly submit my apology. i know you know i know you deserve it and more-- the jabs were mainly directed at the general practice of dispensing such "awards." the sun rises. peace out, senorina.
leee-ah leenger-
dropped the parents off at the airporte about an hour ago[first time driving to LGA]... currently finishing the pint of frozen vanilla yogurt... too much fresh air to go back to sleep... and johnny cash in on too ;)
think of your camera as a Baedeker. in fact, i am officially calling first view of all possible photographs.
in regard to the room with the actual view.
i think after rereading it over the weekend- i see the view. i was reading thru some more of R.W. Emerson's literature as well, Forster's notion is that love is the most transformative of all human experiences... unlike the transcendantalists, he believes that it is only through the true, otherworldly, absolute love for another human that one can overcome themselves, circumstances and society. it is only thru acknowledging that innate truth that one can tap into the power of infinity [see closing paragraph of book].
now that's a brilliant idea for a girl who just can't seem to fall asleep...ever.
;)
call me when you arise with the other snoozin CHers. maybe i'll go for a walk in the mists. or do some experiments with the idle coffee pot.
come over for some noon-in meal... got this incredible israeli sheep-feta cheese number lounging in the fridge.
later love
and dahlin'
as always, no apologies are necessary...
in case you forgot i managed to say "oh, shut up."
;)
by the by i found a pack of gold stars for you in the basement.
Ad Astra Per Aspera
hindi-
i did overdo it; i'm sorry.
ciao.
Post a Comment
<< Home