The CORE: part 1

good evening my friends.
I know it's late... well, i'm in bed, rehashing all the things that went on today... all the many, many, unplanned things (believe it or not girlies, i was meant to do other things tonight ;) not that i'm complaining- i miss those midnight moments.) it always strikes me as funny, how a person can live a life in a single day- go thru the range of emotions, actions, everything...all in the spanse of a few hours. we should all be blessed with days of such nature.

so, i know, my blog is not quite exciting or popular. truthfully, i'm glad. i've lost that ambition some time ago. life is quieter now, taking a new shape, and in a strange way i no longer feel that cyber-performative drive quite as strongly. gives me a bit more leeway to write the Great Whatever ;)

i'd like to share something that i've only recently discovered...see, i work in this amazing institution, this wonderful self-reflexive meditative place, where people think, really think, wonder, dream and honestly act. in this environment, i've managed to put together a list of my Life Essentials. I thought i'd share them. there are six (so now you know to stop reading this blog if you're totally not interested.) it goes with my whole intentionality concept and art with accompany.

so here we go- (and no, this is not prewritten, i'm writing as i go at 3am ;)

ONE: JOY
music thought: www.joykillssorrow.com

Joy to me is Being. That inexplicable, incommunicable part of ourselves that just Is flowing with the World. It is that part that wills us express our Inner Art- our inner- Self- that divine light that when in sync- shimmers and glows with beauty and peace.... it is that force that drives us to stand outside the extra two minutes to enjoy the bright winter sun... that wind that makes us drift off in class imagining the impossible.

Joy is the tenant of all existence. without it we have no purpose. we have no life. we have no spirit. we have no self.
i've realized that it is so easy to let joy disappear, to dis-value it, and let it go, our society stressed it so little...
still, i've thought a very long time about joy. and in my relatively short life process, i've realized, that joy rarely comes to you. joy strikes you, shocks you, dazzles you and sometimes leaves you feeling empty, oddly-lonely and dazed. it comes at odd moments... driving your car on a summer afternoon listening to Emmylou, having a cup of tea, a soaring moment...joy sometimes comes over nothing. over breathing. over being.

Essentially, i've determined that joy comes when one listens to their inner voice....really listens. and, when, mind, heart and spirit are aligned, an incredible lightness of being comes...the dance in the rain, the random tune, the smell of a fragrant flower, suddenly you NOTICE all that surrounds you....all that you are part of.
removed from a regulated society, removed from the classroom, removed from limitations of self- Joy takes you- Joy permeates you- Joy integrates you with life. Suddenly, there is happiness, empowering happiness in being in the moment, in the space, in consciously experiencing bone-deep joy in a shimmering bright world.

The first thought is to find that voice, listen to it- and let it sing. The first part is put Joy in your life and not wait for it to happen to you.

namastaei.