a space for kitchen magic

Listening to The Greencards: "time" (what else are you going to listen to while thinking of the Isle of Skye?) Well, today was a detox day. I'd like to recommend a face-infusion recipe to all: This is one of the most relaxing methods to ease the tension out of your face (ever realized how hard it is to keep that mask in place? unconsciously too...[i'm in purim-planning mode)]

Boil several quarts of water-

In a metal bowl (keeps the water hotter longer)

Add: dried lemon and a few mint leaves (this works well for gentlemen who want to have a clean, fresh smell)

(females add with rose hips and/or a few drops of lavender oil)

Infuse all ingredients together & place a large towel over your head.

Close your eyes. The heat may sting for a bit...but it's worth it. It burns the tension right out of your face....blow into the air to keep the heat circulating.... stay for about 15 minutes then replenish water. For a deeper effect- you can drink the same the tea infusion....

i'm sorry- my eyes hurt to much to be brilliantly entertaining.... i'm off to skye

namastaei.

III: exploring the rains

i'm sitting here, at my computer which is precariously balanced on my desk, a desk overloaded with random papers, Ceram's archeology book, my broken phone, my american airlines flight information, the Ra"Cha"L's text (i'm researching his response to Gershom Scholem for no reason) the Dr. Oz health book (which i've yet to do anything with- for me just having it is a big deal) a calligraphy set, a quill, stationery, my gloves, my speech and an enterance clip from the morgan library... yet again, the wayfaring stranger feeling has returned. like the times when you stare at your image in the mirror and possess your eyes and see, possess your ears and hear, possess your body and feel, possess your self and be.

Today was a snow day so no Hebrew School sojourn. I'm kinda disappointed cuz i had a smashing lesson planned on magic vs. miracle (in connection with our Moshe/10 plagues lesson)....and i miss my students, who are, like their teacher, a bunch of mexican jumping beans overflowing with innovative questions. it's also pre-speech night, not that its helped much. i'm almost bored of my own material... and i hate public speaking, especially when it's going to be televised for absolutely no reason. i am tempted to get on that stage and make farming noises and scream how ridiculous this whole enterprise seems to be...this preposterous indoor activity, when all i want is to be outside...away...to stop talking...and sit in silence with my own thoughts...to be with my own self.....and just make sense. what that must feel like, i have no idea. i can read. i can argue. i can dismantle papers and catch comma splices...but certain things, well, i am just not naturally gifted to do. in this explorative mode- i think it's an opportune time to mention my third value: exploration.

to me, exploration does not imply outward movement, but rather a path inward, a journey in self. a resolve to explore all that comes within and be unafraid to let it take form, to let it change you. it takes courage to do this, perhaps more than discovering new frontiers. there is nothing quite as enigmatic, nothing we run further from, than being conscious, than empowering our own action, than possessing our own selves.

imho, exploration is a life-long preoccupation...a commitment to the gradual unpackaging of self. it's in that that one discovers the space to become, the impetus to grow, and most importantly, the power to transform. it is the courage to face each new wave of life, each new breathtaking experience and let it happen, to make the choice and let it touch you, seeping into your core o being and let it change you.
that's exploration.

there's still so many things i need to do. i am taking a jack kerouac/ robert prisig adventure one day (i gotta finally see this country like it's meant to be seen.) i still gotta see south america, the buddhas of borobudur, the backwaters of kerala, the pushkar camel fair, bostwana's okavango delta, ipanema beach, hell, the whole damn world. and with that, please gd, myself, too, which never seems to be done.


with that i depart,
and wait.
till tomorrow.
deep breaths.
namastaei.

Core II: RELATIONships that sail....

theoretically, a post-evening...at a high level of abstraction:::
all i can say there's no excuse for maturity relapses (with guests no less,) the days when you're back in the purple haze contemplating mass head shavings....

i think i finally get the big brother concept.

sheesh-

relationship with self- letting go at Andy Statman (finally. like a loser. cuz everyone does... ;)
relationship with world- letting others know that you've let go at Andy Statman (particularly, glum listening, striped freakish Park Slope people who are entirely too serious)
relationship with friends- people noticing you've let go at Andy Statman (and being incompetently unreasonably stubborn)
relationships with Others- being okay when you finally resurface from Andy Statman concert.

ta da.

namastaei, and i really really really really mean it. got to stick my head back in the toilet and flush away the last of my common sense....

The CORE: part 1

good evening my friends.
I know it's late... well, i'm in bed, rehashing all the things that went on today... all the many, many, unplanned things (believe it or not girlies, i was meant to do other things tonight ;) not that i'm complaining- i miss those midnight moments.) it always strikes me as funny, how a person can live a life in a single day- go thru the range of emotions, actions, everything...all in the spanse of a few hours. we should all be blessed with days of such nature.

so, i know, my blog is not quite exciting or popular. truthfully, i'm glad. i've lost that ambition some time ago. life is quieter now, taking a new shape, and in a strange way i no longer feel that cyber-performative drive quite as strongly. gives me a bit more leeway to write the Great Whatever ;)

i'd like to share something that i've only recently discovered...see, i work in this amazing institution, this wonderful self-reflexive meditative place, where people think, really think, wonder, dream and honestly act. in this environment, i've managed to put together a list of my Life Essentials. I thought i'd share them. there are six (so now you know to stop reading this blog if you're totally not interested.) it goes with my whole intentionality concept and art with accompany.

so here we go- (and no, this is not prewritten, i'm writing as i go at 3am ;)

ONE: JOY
music thought: www.joykillssorrow.com

Joy to me is Being. That inexplicable, incommunicable part of ourselves that just Is flowing with the World. It is that part that wills us express our Inner Art- our inner- Self- that divine light that when in sync- shimmers and glows with beauty and peace.... it is that force that drives us to stand outside the extra two minutes to enjoy the bright winter sun... that wind that makes us drift off in class imagining the impossible.

Joy is the tenant of all existence. without it we have no purpose. we have no life. we have no spirit. we have no self.
i've realized that it is so easy to let joy disappear, to dis-value it, and let it go, our society stressed it so little...
still, i've thought a very long time about joy. and in my relatively short life process, i've realized, that joy rarely comes to you. joy strikes you, shocks you, dazzles you and sometimes leaves you feeling empty, oddly-lonely and dazed. it comes at odd moments... driving your car on a summer afternoon listening to Emmylou, having a cup of tea, a soaring moment...joy sometimes comes over nothing. over breathing. over being.

Essentially, i've determined that joy comes when one listens to their inner voice....really listens. and, when, mind, heart and spirit are aligned, an incredible lightness of being comes...the dance in the rain, the random tune, the smell of a fragrant flower, suddenly you NOTICE all that surrounds you....all that you are part of.
removed from a regulated society, removed from the classroom, removed from limitations of self- Joy takes you- Joy permeates you- Joy integrates you with life. Suddenly, there is happiness, empowering happiness in being in the moment, in the space, in consciously experiencing bone-deep joy in a shimmering bright world.

The first thought is to find that voice, listen to it- and let it sing. The first part is put Joy in your life and not wait for it to happen to you.

namastaei.